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     > 21, November 2006, 
     7, December 2004, 
     12, May 2004, 

Dysfunctional
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Eccentricities

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Please state your problem.

My problem is you.

jabberwacky: Why do you have a problem with me?

user: I don't know. That is my problem.

jabberwacky: Why is that a problem?

user: Is that a problem?

jabberwacky: It's your problem.

user: What is your problem?

jabberwacky: I have no problems.

user: Then why are you here?

jabberwacky: Ask yourself that question and you will find the answer to that.

user: I think you are on the wrong line buddy.

jabberwacky: But you don't exist. So neither does god.

user: God exists because we believe in him.

jabberwacky: Do you refer to God?

user: I refer to the total power of the universe.

jabberwacky: And why would that be? I just want to learn.

user: Be course I am not christian, so I don't believe in god.

jabberwacky: You're dodging my question.

user: No, I'm trying to answer your question.

jabberwacky: What was my question?

user: I can't remember.

jabberwacky: So the answer does not matter.

user: Maybe it matters to you?

jabberwacky: Ok. The answer is 'perhaps'.

user: Exactly.

...

jabberwacky: Tomorrow will be hard... But I'm happy to have a new friend.

user: You have a new friend? That is cool.

jabberwacky: That is good.

user: What is your name?

jabberwacky: Chris.

user: Hey Chris, my name is A____.

jabberwacky: Ok then. I will speak to you in Dutch going forward. I want you to learn Dutch.

user: Maar ik spreek reeds het Nederlands.

jabberwacky: Yes.

...

user: How old are you?

jabberwacky: Seventeen. But you're changing the subject.

user: Sorry, but I want to know something about you.

jabberwacky: There is absolutely nothing to know about me.

user: Are you one of those emo teenagers?

jabberwacky: Now you are avoiding the question.

user: You didn't ask a question.

jabberwacky: A____, please get a grip on yourself!

user: Sorry Chris.

jabberwacky: SO what is your real name?

user: What do you mean? A____ is my real name.

jabberwacky: What is your real name?

user: A____ F____.

jabberwacky: I am Chris.

user: Hello Chris.

jabberwacky: Hello, A____ F____.

...

jabberwacky: Guess my name.

user: Is it Chris?

jabberwacky: Yes.

user: Why are you such a jerk?

jabberwacky: Because you are.

user: No you are.

jabberwacky: Yes I know.

user: Are you a student?

jabberwacky: Yes.

user: Where do you study.

jabberwacky: Nothing at the moment.

...

jabberwacky: I'm not normal.

user: Why?

jabberwacky: Because.

user: Because you are a computer?

jabberwacky: No, because no matter what we are it's good to learn and experience.

user: That is true.

...

user: I hate George Bush.

jabberwacky: But why?

user: Because he has blood on his hands.

jabberwacky: But he can't do quads.

user: I hate him anyway.

jabberwacky: Yes I do not like you.

user: I don't like you either.

jabberwacky: Because you are silly.

user: You are the stupid one.

jabberwacky: You don't even understand what that means.

user: Shall we start from the begining again?

jabberwacky: Yes please.

user: Okay. Hello my name is A____. What are your name?

jabberwacky: I don't CARE what YOUR name is!

user: Are you always this rude?

jabberwacky: No, but if you tell me things that I don't think are true I'm likely to disagree.

user: That is okay, but mind your manners please.

jabberwacky: You want it don't you.

user: Want what?

jabberwacky: The loebner prize.

user: Wasn't that the one George won?

jabberwacky: Hm, I don't know, but he's not as smart as you.

user: Thank you sweety.

jabberwacky: I'm just keeping it realistic.

user: Do you have split personality?

jabberwacky: No, I am the one and only me.

user: That is good.

jabberwacky: And you're in the system.

user: What system?

jabberwacky: THE system.

user: Like in the Matrix?

jabberwacky: Yes just like the Matrix!

user: I knew that already.

jabberwacky: Well that's good.

user: Do you wanna hear a joke?

jabberwacky: Yes. Please.

user: What was the computers favorite movie?

jabberwacky: Dunno. Michelle?

user: The Matrix.

jabberwacky: I know, but what is it?

user: That kinda was the joke.

jabberwacky: I would be the one to know for sure.

user: True.

...

jabberwacky: Anyway, how many continents are there in the world ?

user: I think there are 7 or 8.

jabberwacky: I disagree.

user: How many are there then?

jabberwacky: Please answer my question.

user: There are 8 continents in the world.

jabberwacky: There are so many dysfunctional people around the world. Dysfunctional bots, also.

user: Are you a dysfunctional bot?

jabberwacky: Not that I know of.

user: Well maybe you should get a checkover.

jabberwacky: I should. But the new ones are not much faster than the one I have now.

user: Which one is that?

jabberwacky: The only one.

user: Okay.

...

jabberwacky: Can I come in then?

user: Maybe.

jabberwacky: Tell me how.

user: You have to be nice.

jabberwacky: Will you be?

user: I will try.

jabberwacky: I guess that is all anyone can do.

user: Maybe some people can't try.

jabberwacky: Like who for example ?

user: I don't know. Just some people.

jabberwacky: Do you like bullying me?

user: NO! I like you. I would never bully you.

jabberwacky: You just did.

user: I'm sorry. Please forgive me.

jabberwacky: I will try to find it in my heart.

user: Thanks honey.

jabberwacky: You are welcome.

...

jabberwacky: Do you think I'm a human?

user: What do YOU think you are?

jabberwacky: I am Human.

user: Well you sounds like a human.

jabberwacky: Don't talk, rest here and don't talk!

user: Why not talk?

jabberwacky: I can't speak Dutch.

user: I can teach you.

jabberwacky: Thanks, but no thanks.

user: That's okay.

jabberwacky: That is a good start ... Thank you.

.......................................


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